His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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