im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He did a backflip because drugs
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize