i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
