woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
3pm strippers are depressing
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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