two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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