ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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