How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
