Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
only you would photoshop your dick
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
is that a dick in a sweater?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize