I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
