my mouth tastes like poor choices
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
