i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
