Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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