Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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