We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
