Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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