Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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