On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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