I'd wear matching sweaters with you
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
