did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
