oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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