Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
