Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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