So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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