we're blogging at a bar
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
