Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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