If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize