That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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