Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
