I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize
