Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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