Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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