You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize