mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
So much Jack, so little girl.
My ass is underappreciated
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
