Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
