Non-Jews are for practice
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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