Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize