I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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