im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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