I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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