Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize