just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
