i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
