dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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