it was like his penis was on wheels.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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