She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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