you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Randomize
