so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize