i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
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I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
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I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
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