I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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