just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize