so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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