If i come over, it means nothing
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
