i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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